HELLO!!!
Hope this blog finds everyone well and relaxing on the other side of the holidays! Holidays can definitely get stressful with 4 small children, but I really had some good time to reflect on the amazing love of Jesus, the true reason for the season! :) So thankful for His amazing grace, guidance, Truth, and love in my times of weakness.
Life in the Ingold tribe has been really good!! I have taken some opportunities to read some books about autism and the spectrum. Interesting reading, for sure!! I have been reading a book entitled, Look Me In the Eye by John Elder Robison. It's a self-exploration book of sorts, in which the author tells of his journey with Aspergers (a developmental delay that is under the autism spectrum disorder). IT IS AMAZING! Robison discusses his battle with Aspergers before he became aware that he was "different." He wasn't diagnosed until he was 40!!!!! Wow. One thing that really stuck out to me, however, was the fact that Robison longed for friendship. By his actions, no one would ever know. Like typical autistic children, Robison played alone, didn't want to talk, didn't look anyone in the eye and just didn't seem engaged in real life. People started leaving him alone at an early age, thinking that's what he wanted. But more than anything, he wanted to have a friend. I think so many times it's easy to just give Ryan "space" when he gets overwhelmed. It seems like he wants to be left alone, but I now know that it is more like a cry for help. Instead of trying to get Ryan "out of his world," why don't we try to meet him in his?! When he flees into the kitchen to play with his countless cars on the kitchen table, why don't we follow him and play the way he wants to play? He may always remember those special bonding moments, though he may never have the capability to tell us. We need to remember this.
I'm so thankful Ryan has syblings. I have been noticing that he has begun to "parrot" them. This is very typical behavior for people on the autistim spectrum, at least that's what I've been told. He has been quoting movies for quite some time, but now he has moved on to parroting others. It can be very funny at times. Sometimes he won't respond appropriately, but I can tell he is getting there and slowly coming out of his shell. Here's an example of what I'm talking about:
Before he would parrot, this is how a typical conversation would sound like:
Person: "Hi Ryan!"
Ryan: Silence, looking at the ground
Person: "How are you?"
Ryan: Silence, looking at the ground
Person: awkward laughter...person gives up trying.
Now, here's what a conversation might sound like after he has started parroting:
Person: "Hey Ryan!!"
Ryan: "Hey Ryan!!"
Person: "How are you?"
Ryan: "Hey Ryan!"
LOL! And we do make this funny because it is! I'm not disappointed in Ryan one bit! To me, this is VERY GREAT PROGRESS! Ryan is actually talking back to the person! That's huge! Soon, he will be able to approriately answer those questions! This is merely practicing his social skills! I love it!
The one major thing I have learned through this entire process is....IT'S A PROCESS! I know, that was deep! :) Ryan learns in a completely different way and it's beautiful. He will learn to appropriately respond to people if we give him time. We can't get frustrated with his time table. Sometimes there will be regression and sometimes there will be progression and that has to be ok with us! I am definitely saying this to ME! There are times of frustration, sure, and there will always be those times. The one thing I know I have is the guidance of the Holy Spirit that so peacably leads me in the right direction for Ryan and all my kiddos. It's amazing! When I am at a loss and I ask the Lord to guide me, HE DOES. Thank you, Lord. I don't know how I'd do life without You!
Before I end, I would like everyone to know that I love talking about my Ryan boy! That's why I have this blog. I don't and will not keep anything hidden from my other children. My 3 others know that there is something "different" with Ryan and I will never hide that from them. We talk about it. I have used the term autism with them. The amazing thing I have noticed about the other 3 is they all have amazing compassion for others. And I believe Ryan has helped them develop that characteristic! I am an open book to any questions you may have about Ryan! I am not a professional on the autism spectrum, but I am a professional on Ryan! Anything you want to know, I can help!! :) He is actually one of my favorite topics to discuss!!
We have our "Ry Guy" on purpose, a true mission sent from God. I pray that I live out this mission to the best of my ability and give God the glory in the midst!
Hope this New Year brings you much joy!!
Blessings!!
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